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Kim Jong Un’s Brother Reportedly Assassinated By Poison Wielding Hit-Girl

The older half-brother of tyrant Kim Jong Un, and once heir to the North Korean autocracy, Kim Jong Nam, was supposedly attacked yesterday morning by a young female assassin wearing hot pink leggings and an LOL branded t-shirt. Some reports state that poisoned needles and/or a poison soaked rag was used in the attack. The whole thing went down inside Kuala Lumpur International Airport in Malaysia, in a merchant concourse on the terminal side of the security line.

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